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Project HEALINGS

Can You Have a Delayed Reaction to Grief?

Grief typically unfolds through five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. While it begins with denial and ends with acceptance, the journey is rarely linear. According to San Francisco therapist Dr. Avigail Lev, individuals often move back and forth between stages—shifting from anger to bargaining, returning to depression, and so on. These stages provide a framework for processing loss, confronting emotions, and moving toward healing. However, in delayed grief, denial persists, leaving unresolved feelings that can complicate the path to recovery.

“In delayed grieving, the denial stage lasts longer, meaning the person remains in denial for a more extended period.” — Dr. Avigail Lev

Signs and Symptoms of Delayed Grief

Delayed grief varies from person to person, with symptoms that can manifest both emotionally and physically. Signs of delayed grief on an emotional level include:

  • A sense of numbness or detachment
  • Intense emotional reactions in response to things that remind you of the loss
  • Feelings of persistent sadness
  • Intrusive thoughts or memories about your loved one
  • Problem enjoying things that used to bring you pleasure
  • Changes in how you feel about yourself, your purpose, or your identity
  • Feelings of guilt or regret

Physical symptoms of delayed grief can include:

  • Changes in sleep, appetite, or body weight
  • Feeling tired or unmotivated
  • Physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, muscle tension, frequent illness, and digestive issues

Self-Care Practices to Support the Grieving Process

If you’re dealing with delayed grief, there are strategies to help you reconnect with your emotions and process them more deeply. Consider trying the following techniques:

  • Journaling: Expressive writing can be a therapeutic way to work through the difficult emotions you are feeling. Consider writing a letter to your loved one or write down your favorite memories of that person.
  • Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness is all about centering your attention on the here and now. It can be a way to connect with what you are feeling and what these feelings mean. Research suggests it can help bereaved people improve emotional regulation and executive function.
  • Stick to a routine: Keeping a regular routine is important when you are dealing with stressful experiences. It can help you maintain a sense of consistency and normalcy, which may help you feel more in control even when things seem hectic or tumultuous.
  • Learn about grief: Spend some time learning about what the normal grieving process looks like, including the stages of grief that people typically experience. It can be comforting to know that what you are experiencing is normal and expected.
  • Honor your loved one: Find meaningful ways to honor the memory of the person you have lost. For example, you might create a memorial or participate in rituals to honor their life.

Healing from grief, especially delayed grief, takes time and patience, but it’s important to know that support and effective treatment options are available. Strategies like grief counseling, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), and expressive arts therapy can help you process your emotions, reconnect with your feelings, and navigate your journey toward acceptance. Whether through talking, mindfulness, creative expression, or structured therapeutic approaches, these options provide valuable tools to address your grief and move forward with greater clarity and resilience.

Reference: https://www.verywellmind.com/can-you-have-a-delayed-reaction-to-grief-8425426

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